a story and an afterthought
so we circled back around to grab some film cannisters when my flashlight’s beam caught glimpse of a mysterious box. "wait what is this" it said..."let’s take a closer look." so we did and it turned out to be an EIKI RT-0 16mm projector. L.U.K.E and i were quite pleased. we snatched up the projector and films and headed to fort isaac ebey to meet up with JUSTEN (whose name signifies his being his mother’s tenth child...when she discovered her pregnancy she exclaimed "please god, jus ten - i can’t afford no more"). we took EIKI into the men’s room at the camp ground and cleaned it up as best we could. of course we wanted to know if EIKI worked - we would have asked him, but he is japanese. EIKI did and does in fact work...he just needed and new bulb. so i ordered two bulbs and we have been gloriously viewing old 16mm educational school films. oh it is wonderful. we also have "the bride of frankenstein" in spanish and a savage jacques custeau film. EIKI is pretty much our new best robot friend; he is quite likeable and quickly becomes the center of attention in any social setting. i posted some pictures of EIKI on here, so you can check ’em out. with all this old film watching, i wonder...
if my life were a 16mm movie currently being projected through the window of my apartment and onto the building next door, would i invite some friends over to sit out on my miniature balcony, puff on a pipe, and all enjoy the film together? or would i find it hopelessly boring and find something better to do? sometimes i think it would be quite dull, lacking most of the available colors of life and living and instead would merely be shaded here and there. but the thing is, i have great desire for colorful life, full and overflowing with most of the combinations the primary colors can produce, i just frequently fail to act on these desires. instead, i often settle for the mundane. for the day to day work, home, eat, t.v., sleep, repeat. like a john prine cd with a scratch, repeating one of his terribly sad lyrics...such as "there’s a hole in daddy’s arm where all the money goes; jesus christ died for nothing i suppose."
i want life. i want beauty. i want adventure and purpose. i want to find myself in situations where i can say "bring me the horizon" and be filled with excitement as to what that may entail. i want love and community. and i want the commitment and energy to be a creator of these things. a builder of the kind of life that makes my wee little heart flutter. there is good news: God is love and love is real (so says a beautiful mewithoutyou lyric - and i believe it). this gives me hope. hope that on that magical day when i load a reel onto our EIKI to play for a small to medium-sized group of friends and my life is what is somehow being projected, that love and life and purpose will ooze down the wall. and we will laugh and sing and dance and celebrate. we will collectively go create some beauty of our own, perhaps. there is beauty in life.
P.S. 1. if you have or know anyone who has old 16mm films that they don’t need, then let me know, because i would love to give them a home.
2. i embellished a little on the story of how we found the projector...all the major parts are real, but luke’s name is not actually an acronym, nor is justin’s.
3. the projector’s name, EIKI, literally means "projector" in japanese. so i guess we have a projector named projector. but EIKI sounds cooler, so we’ll stick with that for now.

